# What is a Fred?



## pitboss12 (Mar 16, 2003)

I don't know the lingo. I've read of people referring to others in Fred jerseys on this site but am not really sure of what " Fred" means. Is a Fred just a poser or a RUB (for those into motorcycles)? Why is it specifically Fred and not Tom or Dick? Just curious.


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## CFBlue (Jun 28, 1999)

From here:

_*fred* n. 1) a person who spends a lot of money on his bike and clothing, but still can't ride. "What a fred -- too much Lycra and titanium and not enough skill." Synonym for poser. Occasionally called a "barney". 2) (from road riding) a person who has a mishmash of old gear, does't care at all about technology or fashion, didn't race or follow racing, etc. Often identified by chainring marks on white calf socks. Used by "serious" roadies to disparage utility cyclists and touring riders, especially after these totally unfashionable "freds" drop the "serious" roadies on hills because the "serious" guys were really posers. According to popular myth, "Fred" was a well-known grumpy old touring rider, who really was named Fred._


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## lemonlime (Sep 24, 2003)

pitboss12 said:


> I don't know the lingo. I've read of people referring to others in Fred jerseys on this site but am not really sure of what " Fred" means. Is a Fred just a poser or a RUB (for those into motorcycles)? Why is it specifically Fred and not Tom or Dick? Just curious.


If you know motorcycles, then a Fred would be more like a squid than a RUB.


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## Inspector Gadget (Apr 5, 2002)

*Get a life*

What, exactly is the definition of can't ride? Seems like the "serious" roadies need to get a life. Bashing anyone who supports their sport, no matter their skill, is what has given roadies a bad name in the past. We whine about not enough respect in the US, yet our collective arrogance is exactly what turns people off. We had a LBS go out of business in my area some years back, in part for such blatant roadie arrogance, so the story goes. Downtalked many people coming in looking for MTB's.
Who cares if someone rides around in full Postal (the most oft bashed) regalia and can't change his own tire. If the "Freds" of the world bought everything at Wal-Mart, the cycling industry would be in dire straits. As an educator in public schools, I see "Freds" in every sport. I have yet to hear a basketball player complain because everyone wanted to "be like Mike" (or LeBron, now). Seems to me wanting to "be like Lance, or Tyler, or Jan, etc." should be flattering. Afterall, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
The real annoyance is the person who drives up to the LBS in a $100k luxury car, and announces he/she does not want to spend more than $150 on a bike, and expects free bottles and cages, etc. after haggling for over an hour.
OK, I'm done ranting


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## bimini (Jul 2, 2003)

*Me*

Fred is a term used by 20 and 30 something year olds that have not grown up yet. It is often used by people that have some deep seated need to elevate themself above others so they can turn up their nose at people that don't look the same as themselves and don't wear all the latest cycling related fashion wear as themselves. Or, by people that need to rationalize all the money they have spend on that Carbon fiber rocket ship and the latest team kits even though they could not do a 1 hour 40 K Timetrial if they were given a 10 K headstart. 

The following is considered Fred like to this crowd. I will start with my favorite:

Wearing wearing sunglasses on the inside of the helmet straps instead of outside.

Wearing mountain bike shorts (or any other shorts other than $50+ spandex with the right logos).

Riding a bike with an old style quill stem which dates the bike as being more than a couple of years old.

Riding a bike without an official non-fred approved jersey. To be approved it needs to be a jersey of one of your local racing clubs, or one of the pro teams or a plain jersey with the right high end fashion logos. Logos with a Performance logo will get you labeled a Fred in many social circles. Also wearing wierd an wild jerseys such as primal wear will get you tagged with the Fred label.

You must read Styleman and follow his religion. Failure to follow his "advice" will immediately get you the scarlet letter of FRED and you will need to spend the reast of your life bearing this social burden.

Grease stains on the socks or worse yet on your jersey are a classic way to get labeled a Fred. If you do get grease on your socks you are to throw them away immediately. While we are on socks this is an excellent way to be labeled a Fred. You are only to wear socks that are Fred free, They must be from a high end source and again have a cute little cycling label on the exposed part covering the ankle. Also they must have an exact amount of material showing. A cm too long or short will get you labeled a Fred for the remainder of your natural born life.

Fortunately the term Fred is a regional thing. It is a very common expression on the west coast and many other large cities. In those areas there are laws that mandate you wear the proper gear and look the look while riding the bike. Failure to do so will get you an immediate sentance of FRED by the fashion police. 

Here in the middle of nowhere I have never heard the word Fred used by any of the hundreds of cyclist I have been around and have chatted with. We all dress like Fred Flinstone and look like Freds, many of us try to out Fred each other on major rides such as RAGBRAI. Forgive us, we are naive and are not even aware of there being the Right Look for riding a bicycle. Instead we ride simply for the pure joy of it.


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## OwenMeany (Mar 17, 2002)

"As an aducator in public schools...."


Ahh...therein lies the problem with our schools.....


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## rodetoruin (Feb 8, 2004)

*Truly sad...*

"As an aducator in public schools... "


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## Slow_Ride (Apr 24, 2004)

rodetoruin said:


> "As an aducator in public schools... "


One typo out of ~200-250 words. This guy should be fired immediately.

Edit: Since that didn't quote the "tuly sad" part, this doesn't make any sense. It's just a typo.


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## rodetoruin (Feb 8, 2004)

*"One typo" and riddled with poor grammar.*



Slow_Ride said:


> One typo out of ~200-250 words. This guy should be fired immediately.
> 
> Edit: Since that didn't quote the "tuly sad" part, this doesn't make any sense. It's just a typo.


"One typo" and riddled with poor grammar.


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## terry b (Jan 29, 2004)

*The archetypical Fred*

The Fred by which all others are measured


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## freezin_is_the_reason (Feb 5, 2004)

*Could it have something to do with hairy legs*

nmnmnmn


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## Spoiler (Jul 6, 2002)

*let's have a REAL cyclist's point of view*



pitboss12 said:


> I don't know the lingo. I've read of people referring to others in Fred jerseys on this site but am not really sure of what " Fred" means. Is a Fred just a poser or a RUB (for those into motorcycles)? Why is it specifically Fred and not Tom or Dick? Just curious.


Since we've included the dictionary definition along with the self-rightious definition, allow me to play the devil's advocate and present the elitist POV. 
Freds are geeks who make serious roadies look bad. They tarnish the sleek, fit image of real cyclist by presenting an image of sloppy, uneducated, bohemianism. They're squirrly riders who join private group rides presenting not only a nuisance, but more importantly a danger with their poor bike handling skills and innane yammering.

Most ride alone for a few months, and after having finally conquering the insurmountable goal of a 30-mile ride, they decide it's time to join a pace line with "them there fancy Cat 1's" They immediately get shelled, and all too often, having taken down half the group. Later that day, they'll post a message to this board describing how they went out for a casual 250 miler on their 1903 highwheeler pennyfarthing, when they came across the USPS team. Said Fred will claim to have casually ridden along side Lance for a few miles before then "totally dropped them", leaving the boys in blue with jaws agape. Still later that day, the Fred will post yet another message asking for the best price on a single HED Trispokes so he can install it on his 1903 Boat Anchor Special.

While manufacturers are hard at work creating light weight technical equipment designed to compliment the already high performancel levels of elite cyclists, Freds take their inheritance and blow it on the carbon bits and ti goodies, all in an effort to up their average speed from 12 to 14 mph. You can't polish a turd. They are also responsible for the continued demand for Primal Wear "Road Dog" "Looney Toons" and "Insane Clown" jerseys. 

Most have begun cycling at such an advanced age that they have no hope of fufilling any true ambition. We have many closet Freds right here among us, clocking up our bandwidth with their foolish questions. 

So until next month, when this question rears its ugly head, drive safe, goodnight!


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## lemonlime (Sep 24, 2003)

*So, you're saying...*



Spoiler said:


> Since we've included the dictionary definition along with the self-rightious definition, allow me to play the devil's advocate and present the elitist POV.
> Freds are geeks who make serious roadies look bad. They tarnish the sleek, fit image of real cyclist by presenting an image of sloppy, uneducated, bohemianism. They're squirrly riders who join private group rides presenting not only a nuisance, but more importantly a danger with their poor bike handling skills and innane yammering.
> 
> Most ride alone for a few months, and after having finally conquering the insurmountable goal of a 30-mile ride, they decide it's time to join a pace line with "them there fancy Cat 1's" They immediately get shelled, and all too often, having taken down half the group. Later that day, they'll post a message to this board describing how they went out for a casual 250 miler on their 1903 highwheeler pennyfarthing, when they came across the USPS team. Said Fred will claim to have casually ridden along side Lance for a few miles before then "totally dropped them", leaving the boys in blue with jaws agape. Still later that day, the Fred will post yet another message asking for the best price on a single HED Trispokes so he can install it on his 1903 Boat Anchor Special.
> ...


...that cycling is only for young, fit people who race?

Oh, sorry! Foolish question...


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## Slow_Ride (Apr 24, 2004)

Spoiler, that was an excellent explanation. That raises another question. How does a Fred such as myself dress, ride, behave, etc on the road so that I don't tarnish the elitist image of the roadies out there?

I fall into almost every category mentioned as a sign of a Fred except I won't run out & spend $5000 on a bike & another grand on attire. I'm 32, only ridden about 10 times total, got into riding becasue I wanted to commute to & from work, did my first 30 mile ride Friday after work, ride a MTB with a ~20Lb backpack full of work clothes, & in general I'm pretty clumsy on my bike. (sorry for the run-on sentence) I only bought what I considered to be the essentials for riding gear: helmet, nice shoes, SPD pedals, & padded shorts but I got the baggy, pocketed kind because I have skinny, chicken legs & didn't want to wear the lycra type.

I admit I probably look sloppy on the road, but I do obey all traffic laws when I ride. I wear my tan shorts, white, logo'd t-shirt, & a red helmet while riding a blue MTB. And I can't ride in a straight line to save my life. I thought if I didn't try to look the part of a real cyclist, people would know I'm a newbie & then not judge the entire cycling community by any mistakes I might make on the road. Was I wrong in my "logic"? 

I quickly found that I enjoy riding & after driving myself crazy researching, I have found the road bike I intend(ed) to buy. I planned to ride the MTB a little more to get in better shape before I pick up the road bike. I had hopes of getting in shape enough to go on group rides & maybe eventually go on charity rides or whatever sounded interesting & fun. Now I'm unsure.  Will I always be considered a nuisance to the "real riders" out there? Should I cancel my order on the road bike & stick to riding my MTB only on dark side streets out of public view?


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## The Walrus (Apr 2, 2000)

*You obey all traffic laws???!?!?!*

The ultimate sign of a Fred!!!!    

Actually, boyRacer's contradictory definitions above need a third on that list, something like _3) a person who is secure enough in his/her riding style not to require the approval of cyclists who have so little going on that they must conform to a rigid code to make themselves feel like someone_.

Ride what you want, how you want (as long as you're not endangering anyone) and enjoy. If someone calls you a Fred, just say "Bet your a$$ I am, and I'm proud of it!"


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## Spoiler (Jul 6, 2002)

*You've got to work on you Freddness*



Slow_Ride said:


> Spoiler, that was an excellent explanation. That raises another question. How does a Fred such as myself dress, ride, behave, etc on the road so that I don't tarnish the elitist image of the roadies out there?
> 
> I fall into almost every category mentioned as a sign of a Fred except I won't run out & spend $5000 on a bike & another grand on attire. I'm 32, only ridden about 10 times total, got into riding becasue I wanted to commute to & from work, did my first 30 mile ride Friday after work, ride a MTB with a ~20Lb backpack full of work clothes, & in general I'm pretty clumsy on my bike. (sorry for the run-on sentence) I only bought what I considered to be the essentials for riding gear: helmet, nice shoes, SPD pedals, & padded shorts but I got the baggy, pocketed kind because I have skinny, chicken legs & didn't want to wear the lycra type.
> 
> ...


Actually, the most important part of my post was the first sentence. The post was a joke, a Johnathan Swift style parody. 
Just by being a member of roadbike review, and viewing the forums, you're avoiding what many Freds do. They don't bother asking questons or researching for intelligent choices. 
Freds will spend $50 on a flashlight and ducttape it to their handlebars instead of getting a decent bike light. Freds will buy Colnago C-40 that's 8 cm too small. Freds will strap a 10 ft orange flat to their bike, one that causes them to crash in the wind, instead of buying a $10 red flashing light. Freds will ride up the wrong way on a one way street, at least when they aren't riding on the sidewalks. 
I guess a person becomes a real roadie when they start consistently take bike rides when it's not just for commuting. They don't ride it just to get somewhere, they do it for fun. We ride to absolutely nowhere for no practical reason, then ride back home. 
You'll probably start wearing lycra and bike jerseys when the temps go up. They are so much more comfortable, they'll become worth the embarrassment. Don't purposefully avoid them. 
Many, not all, but many mountain bikers purposefully avoid adopting roadie wear and culture, due to a preconceived notions or sheer stubborness. They'll wear T-shirts and baggies because they don't want people to mistake them for a "[email protected] Roadie". They'll purposefully avoid getting a properly fit road bike, choosing instead to grind away on a $3k FS rig. 
You're in bike rider Limbo. You could go either way. Either way, embrace your true essance.


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## Slow_Ride (Apr 24, 2004)

I took what you said as more of a joke than anything serious. I'm just having fun riding but trying not to give the whole biking community a black eye by acting like an ass on the road. I come from the 4X4 community where one dipsh** on the trails can ruin it for everyone so I try to obey as many written & unwritten rules as I can when I'm on the road.

I don't see that many riders on my commute or joy rides I take on the weekends. When I do see someone who "looks the part" of a cyclist, I try to keep up & learn from his/her form, but so far I've been stuck riding solo. The one time I actually had the chance to ride behind a small group, I got a flat & then only saw riders going the other way. That's about how my luck goes.

Anyway, back on subject. Wait, what is the subject? Oh never mind.


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## Just Mike (Feb 15, 2004)

Pay attention: This is a Fred.

Class dismissed.


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## colker1 (Jan 2, 2003)

*sorry double post*

double entry sorry


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## colker1 (Jan 2, 2003)

*ok.*

but... what is a baldwin? and a fred baldwin?


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## blurry (Mar 4, 2004)

*Damn it i'm a fred*



boyRacer said:


> From here:
> 
> _*fred* n. 1) a person who spends a lot of money on his bike and clothing, but still can't ride. "What a fred -- too much Lycra and titanium and not enough skill." Synonym for poser. Occasionally called a "barney". 2) (from road riding) a person who has a mishmash of old gear, does't care at all about technology or fashion, didn't race or follow racing, etc. Often identified by chainring marks on white calf socks. Used by "serious" roadies to disparage utility cyclists and touring riders, especially after these totally unfashionable "freds" drop the "serious" roadies on hills because the "serious" guys were really posers. According to popular myth, "Fred" was a well-known grumpy old touring rider, who really was named Fred._


damn damn damn my name is Fred so i must be destined for failure, i may as well wear tube socks and ride on the wrong side of the road.


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## MR_GRUMPY (Aug 21, 2002)

*"You can't polish a turd"*

Many "Freds" show up for a ride without the proper equipment. (No spare tube and no tire levers) A true "Fred" will borrow your tire levers and proceed to break one. When you tell him not to worry about it, he doesn't.
The worst kind of "Fred", is a "Fred" on your own team. He'll talk and talk and talk about getting out there and doing a race, and when he does, he'll have a list of excuses two feet long, on why he got dropped on the first lap.
When you try to explain to him what went wrong, it'll be like talking to a cow. The words just go in one ear and drop on the ground on the other side. In the middle of your lesson on how to train, he'll interupt you to tell you that next week he'll be so much faster on those "new and improved" 50 gram tubes.
It just goes to show that "racer types" can be Freds also.


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## pugdog1 (Mar 23, 2004)

Sounds like a "Fred" just spends realtively big money on the hobbies he chooses to take up. 

Do you have a name for a guy that drives a 2004 Ferrari 360 spider but doesnt hang out with some bike shop flunkies?? I do, its RICH!!!! Lets hear it for all of the Rich guys out there!!!! Woo-hoo!

Pretty shallow non "Fred's", lets all share the roads!


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## Inspector Gadget (Apr 5, 2002)

*Yikes!*



OwenMeany said:


> "As an aducator in public schools...."
> 
> 
> Ahh...therein lies the problem with our schools.....


OOPS! My typing (and proofreading) skills never were the best on screen. Anyway, it's fixed. Thanks for being my copyright editor. I usually try to fix those embarrasing little problems before I submit. Alas, my rant clouded my eyesight. Or could it have been that I was still recovering from my first half century this season with lots of headwind the previous day? I may have been suffering from the residual effects of seeing God.


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## owmynads (Sep 9, 2003)

I find this thread amusing. I think some people take the view that cycling is just some big fraternity. And fraternities have always amused me. A bunch of insecure guys run out to a house and are willing to subjugate themselves because, "My, my, my mommy says I should go to college and make some friends, so, can I hang out with you guys? Can I? Huh?" Sure, Skippy. Just put on this jockstrap and this sheep costume and we'll see you on the quad at noon.

Goddamn idiots. Be who you are. [email protected] all the rest. If you enjoy riding, enjoy it for yourself. I think most people get into this, as one poster has said, "too late in life to do much of anything [my paraphrase] in the racing world." While I doubt any of us in this super-focus-grouped, overmarketed world can defy labeling by people who know jack squat about us, I think it's important not to be as insecure as some frat rush, trying so hard to fit in that he becomes a misfit.

OwMyNads


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## Spoiler (Jul 6, 2002)

*Fred Enzo*



pugdog1 said:


> Sounds like a "Fred" just spends realtively big money on the hobbies he chooses to take up.
> 
> Do you have a name for a guy that drives a 2004 Ferrari 360 spider but doesnt hang out with some bike shop flunkies?? I do, its RICH!!!! Lets hear it for all of the Rich guys out there!!!! Woo-hoo!
> 
> Pretty shallow non "Fred's", lets all share the roads!


Building on your Ferrari analogy, and using what we've defined as a Fred, car Fred would buy the Ferrari thinking that it will turn him into Mario Andretti. 
He'd probably buy it, then post a question on Ferrarireview.com asking how to operate a stick shift. 
He'd also buy it thinking he'll be able to use it to enter himself into the 24 hours of LeMans. 
He'd also buy it as the one and only car for his family of 5. 
He'd also guy it and take it to Jiffy Lube to get all the maintenance done on it. 
He'd also add on a $20 plastic spoiler thinking it would add another 50mph to it's top end speed. 
He'd also buy it, then drive around the local Walmart parking lot wearing a full face helmet and fire protective racing suit. 
This is the type of activity we're talking about. It's not being shallow, it's laughing at bonehead behavior.


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## pugdog1 (Mar 23, 2004)

Spoiler said:


> Building on your Ferrari analogy, and using what we've defined as a Fred, car Fred would buy the Ferrari thinking that it will turn him into Mario Andretti.
> He'd probably buy it, then post a question on Ferrarireview.com asking how to operate a stick shift.
> He'd also buy it thinking he'll be able to use it to enter himself into the 24 hours of LeMans.
> He'd also buy it as the one and only car for his family of 5.
> ...



DOH! A total wreck in the making...


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## Spoiler (Jul 6, 2002)

pugdog1 said:


> DOH! A total wreck in the making...


This behavior is also seen in the Harley circles. It's sad because every year I read about 40 and 50-thing business men who got the urge to be a Hell's Angel for a day. They can afford a Harley, so they jump right in, thinking they're too smart to need a proper training course or helmet. They get themselves killed withing the first couple rides.


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## Dave_Stohler (Jan 22, 2004)

*Freds Vs. Phreds*

Around here, we have both. The local Fred moniker usually means some guy who's clueless about what's "proper" for components, jerseys, etc. A guy who wears ATB shoes on a Lightspeed is a Fred. A guy who wears jersys that clash with his frame color is a Fred. Mixing and matching parts makes you a Fred. Damn, that makes me a Fred....

OTOH, there are the Phreds. These are the guys who use bikes (mostly older, good quality bikes) as a social statement. They don't own cars, although most of them could afford to do so. They usually smoke, hang around coffee shops, and most seem to have money, since they don't seem to work. Those who do work tend to be employes in either social service jobs or academia. Not quite a hippy, not quite a granola freak, but not quite a cyclist, either. Many ride fixed gear here...


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## george_da_trog (Feb 12, 2004)

rodetoruin said:


> "One typo" and riddled with poor grammar.


It depends on what you teach doesn't it? Do you expect an English teacher to know how to do geometry proofs? Does this guy teach English maybe he teaches math?

george


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## russw19 (Nov 27, 2002)

I don't know about that... my shop stocked Turd Polish! We had to break it out once in a while too. 

The thing about polishing a turd is that you rub and rub and rub with the Turd Polish, and you can make that turd shine, but at the end of the day it still smells like a turd. 

I used to work at a shop where the owner would say something to that effect whenever someone would try to spend more to fix a cheap bike than what it was worth. You could make that cheap bike shine, but at the end of the day, it was still just another cheap bike. (Kinda like taking a Dodge Neon and adding a turbocharger to it.) It was never said to be derogatory to the customer, but just to try to explain that they are passing the point of deminishing returns on their bike. 

Russ


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## MShaw (Jun 7, 2003)

pitboss12 said:


> I don't know the lingo. I've read of people referring to others in Fred jerseys on this site but am not really sure of what " Fred" means. Is a Fred just a poser or a RUB (for those into motorcycles)? Why is it specifically Fred and not Tom or Dick? Just curious.


At one point here, there was a "cyclists' pecking order" list. I thought I'd copied it and sent it to some friends, but I guess the computer langoliers at it.

The label "Fred" is so subjective that its hard to explain. The least common denominator is that the "Fred" in question is completely clueless as to why he's a Fred.

Freds are not to be confused with Poseurs. We've kinda been crossing the line back and forth in our "Fred" definition in this thread... A Poseur is the guy with the $5k bike, all the team kit, talks a big game and then come race time, you never see him. (sounds like me right now! Whaitaminit!) Or if he DOES come to a race, he gets shelled in the first few laps. When you call him/her on it, there's a list of excuses a mile long as to why he/she didn't win.

There's also the group that LOOKS like a Fred, but ain't. Those are the guys/girls you REALLY gotta look out for. They're usually riding something that was top of the line about 10 years ago, with circa the same era clothing. Lots of times these non-Freds are more concerned with riding (or they're just genetically gifted) than looking good and can rip the legs off most of the people they're riding with. I've met a few. Its humbling.

Freds CAN change. If you're labeled a Fred, all is not lost. All it takes is someone to explain WHY you're a Fred. Often education is all it takes. 

Sometimes you run into an uber Fred that revels in his/her Fred-ness and just WILL NOT conform (behavior in a pack, not looks). These you just gotta either avoid 'cause they can be dangerous, or accept them as Freds and let them ride on their own path.

Its hard to explain Fred in terms of motorcyclists. Depending on your context, the guys riding around in 'Stiches and flip helmets are probably the closest thing. If you're one of that group (and I sorta fall into that category riding my BMW), NOT wearing that gear labels you as a Fred.

RUBs kinda qualify 'cause they THINK that they're motorcyclists, but they're really bikers. Riding their shiny, new cruisers from bar to bar and profiling is Fred-like to those that actually DO ride more than a few thousand miles/year.

Squids are more like Poseurs. They've bought the leathers, the replica helmet, and the Gixxer/insert other models here. They don't really know how to ride, but they do it WAY FAST! You'll find the Squid on your local twisties trying to outdo each other instead of on the racetrack. 

HTH,

M


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## haiku d'etat (Apr 28, 2001)

*ROTFLMAO! nm*

no message


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## haiku d'etat (Apr 28, 2001)

*you win*

"He'd also buy it, then drive around the local Walmart parking lot wearing a full face helmet and fire protective racing suit."

i just shot coffee out of my nose.


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## The Walrus (Apr 2, 2000)

*No, mixing and matching parts (probably) makes you...*

...a cyclocrosser.

...and a guy who wears ATB shoes on a Litespeed (or any other make) is _sensible_ if, like me, he's actually gonna get off the bike and walk around at some point.


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## Cool Roadie nom de Plume (Apr 8, 2004)

*Say it loud - I'm a Fred and I'm Proud*

"guy who wears ATB shoes on a Lightspeed is a Fred"

After blowing all my dough on my '04 Tuscany I will be riding the sucker with ATB shoes, pedals and my ATB peaked helmet as well for the first few months.

Maybe I should have downgraded my bike so I could buy the whole kit and not look like a Fred.

Freds of the world unite!


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## Dwaynebarry (Mar 16, 2004)

*Agree, you've come the closest...*

to defining the undefinable. You know a Fred when you see one but beyond that it's hard to put into words. As you say, a Fred and a poseur are not the same thing. Although you seem to be equating Fredness with not riding fast, I wouldn't. Being a Fred is essentially being clueless about cycling (how to ride, racing, style, etc.). Lots of guys are knowledgable, etc. but just aren't fast for whatever reason. Most newbies are Freds because they simply are new to the sport.


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## Scot_Gore (Jan 25, 2002)

*Oh, I was wondering what the new handle would be.*

Good to see you Mike...................................... I mean, Fred.


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## Mike T. (Feb 3, 2004)

Just Mike said:


> Pay attention: This is a Fred.
> 
> Class dismissed.


That ain't even close to being a fred. Could this be a fred -


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## MrDan (Jan 23, 2003)

*It would appear that a FRED is*

simply someone you don't approve of from reading these posts. It would appear that some are offended by others appearance/manner of dress, or thoughtlessness, or failure of reciprocity or whatever the hell else puts a stick up your a-- at the moment and that more likely reflects on your own inadequacies, rather than the person who is the target of the FRED moniker....

It's not about the bike... it's not about the shoes..., it's not about anything other than putting someone else down. We all ride for different combinations of reasons. Just accept people for who they are and don't let it irritate you. Be happy that you're you, and they are well... them.

JMHO,

-D (also a FRED)


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## Dave_Stohler (Jan 22, 2004)

That's not a Fred, that's a *travesty*!!


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## Ricko (Jan 22, 2004)

*I'm Fred and d**n proud of it...*



pitboss12 said:


> I don't know the lingo. I've read of people referring to others in Fred jerseys on this site but am not really sure of what " Fred" means. Is a Fred just a poser or a RUB (for those into motorcycles)? Why is it specifically Fred and not Tom or Dick? Just curious.


I'm a mountain biker but my training ride is a swank Ti framed roadie. I wear an MTB helmet with the viser yanked off, loose fitting jersey, baggy shorts and naturally...mtb shoes.

Form fitting lycra doesn't work for me and you can't walk in the shoes, one of these days I'l get a real road helmet though<


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## Len J (Jan 28, 2004)

*Everybody is a fred............*

to someone!

Just ride your bike.

As Spirito says....."We're all cyclist!"

Len


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## bimini (Jul 2, 2003)

*Stand back it's going to explode!*

A lot of folks were not meant to wear skinsuits.


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## litespeedchick (Sep 9, 2003)

I see one missing question mark, and the phrase "after all" run together. Both quite acceptable for speed typing on a message board, IMO. To what grammatical errors do you refer?


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## rodetoruin (Feb 8, 2004)

*Anyone who wears a helmet.*

A piece of foam and plastic that straps to your head and is designed to protect you from injury if you FALL OFF YOUR BIKE--what could be more Fred-like than falling off your bike?


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## rodetoruin (Feb 8, 2004)

*He edited the post and cleaned it up.*

He edited the post and cleaned it up.


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## colker1 (Jan 2, 2003)

Mike T. said:


> That ain't even close to being a fred. Could this be a fred -


isn't that marilyn manson?


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## carver (Aug 15, 2002)

*Oh My!!*



Mike T. said:


> That ain't even close to being a fred. Could this be a fred -


THAT is other worldly - way way way beyond Fred.


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## Steve-O (Jan 28, 2004)

*Hey Fred!*



Ricko said:


> I'm a mountain biker but my training ride is a swank Ti framed roadie. I wear an MTB helmet with the viser yanked off, loose fitting jersey, baggy shorts and naturally...mtb shoes.
> 
> Form fitting lycra doesn't work for me and you can't walk in the shoes, one of these days I'l get a real road helmet though<


How are those Easton Carbon bars working out for you? Do you like 'em?

Steve ( thinking about an upgrade!)


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## Old_school_nik (May 21, 2002)

*Lol!!!!*



colker1 said:


> isn't that marilyn manson?



ROTFLOLOL!

Don't diss that guy he is a gold medal holder in the luge!

-Nik


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## Ricko (Jan 22, 2004)

*Hey Steve!...*



Steve-O said:


> How are those Easton Carbon bars working out for you? Do you like 'em?
> 
> Steve ( thinking about an upgrade!)


Yup, I'm liking those bars a lot. The ergo bend is comfy in the drops and I dropped a few grams too

LOL, speaking of weight. I bumped into a friend who rides a Harley and he was telling me what a b**ch it was riding in that wind on Monday...I told him geez, you oughta' try riding a 17lb road bike instead of a 700lb hog! (that'l never happen).

I'm STOKED for Moab...two more work days


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## CFBlue (Jun 28, 1999)

*I think I am*

About all I know about this roadie thing at this point in time is how to pedal. So much lingo and stuff going around... Oh and I bought my shoes because 1. They were comfy, 2. They were on sale, and 3. They look neat being carbon and all 

Kyle


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## 53T (Jul 20, 2002)

*Good Gravy!*



george_da_trog said:


> It depends on what you teach doesn't it? Do you expect an English teacher to know how to do geometry proofs? Does this guy teach English maybe he teaches math?
> 
> george


YES, I expect an english teacher to know geometry (and trig) at the high school level. I expect math teachers to speak and write at 12th grade level. Am I alone in this expectation?


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## MShaw (Jun 7, 2003)

MrDan said:


> It's not about the bike... it's not about the shoes..., it's not about anything other than putting someone else down. We all ride for different combinations of reasons. Just accept people for who they are and don't let it irritate you. Be happy that you're you, and they are well... them.
> 
> JMHO,
> 
> -D (also a FRED)


This is the classic definition of a Fred if I've ever heard one! Probably borderline Uber-Fred 'cause he knows better, and don't care.

Not that I've ever met the man. He very well could be the picture of Cat2 grace and style... 

I'm using his post as an example and am not trying to denigrate.

Freds don't irritate me unless I'm riding in a pack with one and they do something stupid. 

M


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## bimini (Jul 2, 2003)

*Better Fred than Dead or better Dead than Fred*



rodetoruin said:


> A piece of foam and plastic that straps to your head and is designed to protect you from injury if you FALL OFF YOUR BIKE--what could be more Fred-like than falling off your bike?


I have to agree, having ridden a bike for 20 some odd years without one. I started riding in the early 70's, back then not even the geeks wore helmets. Even after flying over the top of a car and ending up in the hospital with head injuries, I still would not be caught dead in a stupid looking helmet. (ahh, the ignorant bliss of youth!)

Now I wear one, ALWAYS. But I still feel like a geek with it on. 

It's hard not too laugh when someone is coping an attitude of superiority and coolness when they are wearing an idiotic looking bicycling helmet. Even if it is a $200 limited edition whatchamacalit in USPS team colors, it still looks silly.

Face it, were all Fred to the outside world. Shaved legs, spandex tights, brightly colored jersey with logos, silly looking helmet and sillier lookin sunglasses. Oh yeah, don't forget those silly looking shoes with the velcro straps (don't he know how to tie his own laces without his mommies help) with the silly cleats that make that wonderful clip clop sound as you walk through the quicky mart. God, I'm feeling real superior now just thinking about it! Transvestites on parade! No wonder we all ride in groups, strength in numbers.

I'm just getting too old. Cool use to be a pair of cutoff shorts, a skin tight tee shirt, an old grease stained worn out Campy cycling cap worn backwards and a pair of cheap sunglasses. At least I felt like a man back then.


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## terzo rene (Mar 23, 2002)

I have to disagree with the sunglasses inside the helmet straps. That would make every pro in europe a Fred. I used to put the sunglasses on the outside but after a few bees in my bonnet and having to take off sunglasses and then helmet to liberate the angry little bugger I started doing it the other way. I also switched to a Limar helmet which has much better bug flow through.

I tend to think of Fred's as the overweight granola eating facial hair tourist centric crowd.


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## carver (Aug 15, 2002)

*That Pic is just too much!!*



carver said:


> THAT is other worldly - way way way beyond Fred.


Still can't believe that pic. just got back from a 3hr ride and I have to admit I just kept chuckling. Its fred to the third power - you know - fred cubed.

But I'm over it now.


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## sorebut (Nov 21, 2001)

This is a very good thread! thank you.. this term is being thrown around loosely.. 

Example: I was setting up for a ride with my friend at a parking lot in Woodside, and a rider was circling the lot on his bike waiting for his buddy.. He was wearing a slick skin suit, no seat wedge, no pump, nothing in his pockets, the hottest pair of sun glasses, and of course no helmet. The definition of "cool" (I guess).. 

When his buddy shows up, I can hear him referring to me and my friend as "Freds"...
I don't care if you call me a Fred, but my friend and riding buddy if the farthest from being a Fred. it is true that we are both in our 50s, and not in as good a shape as this slick dude, but my friend was rated in the Montreal Olympics as the 6th fastest rider in the world, and rode professionally in Italy for 5 years.. So a Fred he aint! He maybe riding an 15 year old bike (custom built for him), and has a "frame pump" on it, and his shorts had seen better days, but he is no Fred.. So I think the word has lost its original meaning as is now being thrown around as a general insult.. I suggest we retire the word Fred..


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## Guest (May 22, 2004)

Spoiler said:


> Since we've included the dictionary definition along with the self-rightious definition, allow me to play the devil's advocate and present the elitist POV.
> Freds are geeks who make serious roadies look bad. They tarnish the sleek, fit image of real cyclist by presenting an image of sloppy, uneducated, bohemianism. They're squirrly riders who join private group rides presenting not only a nuisance, but more importantly a danger with their poor bike handling skills and innane yammering.
> 
> Most ride alone for a few months, and after having finally conquering the insurmountable goal of a 30-mile ride, they decide it's time to join a pace line with "them there fancy Cat 1's" They immediately get shelled, and all too often, having taken down half the group. Later that day, they'll post a message to this board describing how they went out for a casual 250 miler on their 1903 highwheeler pennyfarthing, when they came across the USPS team. Said Fred will claim to have casually ridden along side Lance for a few miles before then "totally dropped them", leaving the boys in blue with jaws agape. Still later that day, the Fred will post yet another message asking for the best price on a single HED Trispokes so he can install it on his 1903 Boat Anchor Special.
> ...


Boy you're a real treat to have around!


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## Guest (May 22, 2004)

Dave_Stohler said:


> Around here, we have both. The local Fred moniker usually means some guy who's clueless about what's "proper" for components, jerseys, etc. A guy who wears ATB shoes on a Lightspeed is a Fred. A guy who wears jersys that clash with his frame color is a Fred. Mixing and matching parts makes you a Fred. Damn, that makes me a Fred....
> 
> OTOH, there are the Phreds. These are the guys who use bikes (mostly older, good quality bikes) as a social statement. They don't own cars, although most of them could afford to do so. They usually smoke, hang around coffee shops, and most seem to have money, since they don't seem to work. Those who do work tend to be employes in either social service jobs or academia. Not quite a hippy, not quite a granola freak, but not quite a cyclist, either. Many ride fixed gear here...


So - if I wear MTB shoes on my Record equipped baby when riding to and from work - because I can walk in them - I'm a Fred?! Regardless of the fact that I've been riding for thirty years and even with Panniers and a backpack I can ride with the local clubs paceline - I'm a fred?

Great - let's have more Freds!


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## the bull (Jan 16, 2003)

*If you read bicycling magazine you are a fred!*

Cyclesport is much better!
PS Styleman is the ony stuff in bicycling mag that is worth reading.You got to admit ...its funny!


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## divve (May 3, 2002)

Two weeks ago I saw 3 Americans on my ride to Belgium. They were on road bikes with MTB pedals, were wearing MTB shoes, had saddle bags, all Shimano, and worst of all they maxed out at around 15mph and still were so scared they wore helmets and probably are reading this right now


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## Deluxe (May 10, 2004)

the bull said:


> Cyclesport is much better!
> PS Styleman is the ony stuff in bicycling mag that is worth reading.You got to admit ...its funny!


Especially this June's column, when he writes about the the "thong" rap!


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## The Human G-Nome (Aug 26, 2002)

Dave_Stohler said:


> OTOH, there are the Phreds. These are the guys who use bikes (mostly older, good quality bikes) as a social statement. They don't own cars, although most of them could afford to do so. They usually smoke, hang around coffee shops, and most seem to have money, since they don't seem to work. Those who do work tend to be employes in either social service jobs or academia. Not quite a hippy, not quite a granola freak, but not quite a cyclist, either. Many ride fixed gear here...


There are literally THOUSANDS of these guys in San Francisco. Fashion comes first. Fashion comes second. Fashion comes third. And then somewhere around 4th place you have skill and riding ability. If you aren't riding a fixie with an old school Italian steel frame and sporting cutoff shorts and a chain in your pocket for your wallet then you just aren't up to snuff. I think some people around here get into "cycling" ONLY for the fashion. I admit, some of it is nice, but after you've see 400 other people that look EXACTLY like you doesn't it get a little old? I'm sure it's just my old, over thirty (over the hill), out of touch with my punk roots geezer heart who thinks it's silly. At least the costumes that actual cyclists wear are functional and have a point.


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## firstrax (Nov 13, 2001)

Fred!


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## happycx (Jul 6, 2003)

*Arrggghhhhh!*



firstrax said:


> Fred!


What the hell just happened to my monitor??????????????????


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## Rollo Tommassi (Feb 5, 2004)

*Fred Picture #2*

Every year I trot this image out:


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## PseuZQ (Mar 27, 2002)

Get over yourself. 

nnnnnnnnmmmmmmmm


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## blackhat (Jan 2, 2003)

*why?*



firstrax said:


> Fred!


why would someone allow themselves to be photographed like that? even if the pic is a decade and a half old and its current "kit", the idea of posing (as he(?) clearly is) for a picture <i>off</i> of the bike, yet still wearing the cycling clothes is just a complete nonstarter. nothing good can come of it. I think that pic may be the tipping point, I'm going to start riding in cargo shorts, tiedyes and spd sandals lest I ever resemble that in any way.


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## Ricko (Jan 22, 2004)

*As the old saying goes,*



pitboss12 said:


> I don't know the lingo. I've read of people referring to others in Fred jerseys on this site but am not really sure of what " Fred" means. Is a Fred just a poser or a RUB (for those into motorcycles)? Why is it specifically Fred and not Tom or Dick? Just curious.


If yuh have to ask.........


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## PseuZQ (Mar 27, 2002)

Bienvenue Equipe "Touch My Monkey!" 

nnnnmmmm


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## sgt_hedgehog (Jun 28, 2004)

I dont really have a problem with 'freds' i just pass them and say hi like the good sameritan i am  Look at Fred Rodriguez (whom i know personally) he's a Fred and he's DEFINETLY not a fred.


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## njmtbbg (Aug 19, 2003)

*Thank God for Freds...*

They prop up the industry that turns out high performance products. 

Freds = Cash Flow

BTW, I stopped judging the appearance of other people when I was in High School....and that was quite a while ago.

B.


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## pr0230 (Jun 4, 2004)

*Wow!*

All of this for a four letter F word....

Fred you!


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## KevinC (Aug 2, 2004)

*Oh Crap, this again, guess I'll have to read all 75 replies..nm*

nm nm


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## FishrCutB8 (Aug 2, 2004)

rodetoruin said:


> A piece of foam and plastic that straps to your head and is designed to protect you from injury if you FALL OFF YOUR BIKE--what could be more Fred-like than falling off your bike?


As a person who worked with Traumatic Brain Injured patients, I would say that having to get someone else to wipe your ass or clean drool off your chin because your paralyzed because you "didn't want to look stupid" would be worse. But that's just my opinion.....I could be wrong.


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## KevinC (Aug 2, 2004)

*As a soon-to-be educator in public schools...*



Inspector Gadget said:


> What, exactly is the definition of can't ride? Seems like the "serious" roadies need to get a life. Bashing anyone who supports their sport, no matter their skill, is what has given roadies a bad name in the past. We whine about not enough respect in the US, yet our collective arrogance is exactly what turns people off. We had a LBS go out of business in my area some years back, in part for such blatant roadie arrogance, so the story goes. Downtalked many people coming in looking for MTB's.
> Who cares if someone rides around in full Postal (the most oft bashed) regalia and can't change his own tire. If the "Freds" of the world bought everything at Wal-Mart, the cycling industry would be in dire straits. As an educator in public schools, I see "Freds" in every sport. I have yet to hear a basketball player complain because everyone wanted to "be like Mike" (or LeBron, now). Seems to me wanting to "be like Lance, or Tyler, or Jan, etc." should be flattering. Afterall, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
> The real annoyance is the person who drives up to the LBS in a $100k luxury car, and announces he/she does not want to spend more than $150 on a bike, and expects free bottles and cages, etc. after haggling for over an hour.
> OK, I'm done ranting




This post makes me proud of my desired profession! Well Said!


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## FishrCutB8 (Aug 2, 2004)

*Ahhhhhhhhh--my Eyes!!!!*

It burns us, it burns us.....


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## cdmc (Feb 3, 2004)

Frankly, I really don't care about the whole fred thing, but these (which have been posted before) are so scary they have to be shared. If anyone fits the definition, it has to be this guy.


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## jakerson (Jun 15, 2004)

cdmc said:


> it has to be this guy.


OMG!!! PLEASE STOP POSTING PICS OF THIS GUY!!!

*Im laughing so hard Im gonna split my spandex*


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## cdmc (Feb 3, 2004)

For the truly brave here is a link to his website: http://www.bikerfox.com/glamourshots/index.htm (taken from MTBR thread).

And just to help those who were about to puck a few more pictures for your viewing pleasure. The scary thing about this guy is that no matter how many times you see the photos, they continue to be disturbing. You can't help but look, not because you want to see the pictures, but just out of morbid curiosity of what the next picture will be.


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## FishrCutB8 (Aug 2, 2004)

OMG...You cannot be serious. Laughing so hard I'm crying--People in the office are stopping by my cube to see if I'm okay.


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## Marcus75 (Feb 17, 2004)

*Fashion?*



The Human G-Nome said:


> There are literally THOUSANDS of these guys in San Francisco. Fashion comes first. Fashion comes second. Fashion comes third. And then somewhere around 4th place you have skill and riding ability. If you aren't riding a fixie with an old school Italian steel frame and sporting cutoff shorts and a chain in your pocket for your wallet then you just aren't up to snuff. I think some people around here get into "cycling" ONLY for the fashion. I admit, some of it is nice, but after you've see 400 other people that look EXACTLY like you doesn't it get a little old? I'm sure it's just my old, over thirty (over the hill), out of touch with my punk roots geezer heart who thinks it's silly. At least the costumes that actual cyclists wear are functional and have a point.



Obviously you don't know Los Angeles (land of botex and plastic surgeory)! I see a lot of guys here with their 3K and 5K rigs deck out in the latest cycle apparels. It is kind of comical when their Slow as hell


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## Biker_Fox (Nov 12, 2004)

This is a Fred.


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## CFBlue (Jun 28, 1999)

*article*



pitboss12 said:


> I don't know the lingo. I've read of people referring to others in Fred jerseys on this site but am not really sure of what " Fred" means. Is a Fred just a poser or a RUB (for those into motorcycles)? Why is it specifically Fred and not Tom or Dick? Just curious.


http://www.adventurecorps.com/way/freds.html


Also, while we're at it:

http://www.adventurecorps.com/way/style.html


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## ttug (May 14, 2004)

*I have met Fred and I am not worthy*

I met Fred in 2002 at an unrated open 40k TT.

Fred showed up on a 1978 stock Peugeot, Chuck Taylor high tops, swimming trunks, bright white zinc sun block that made his hairy body appear to be an albino Yeti on acid.

Fred finished in the top 2 with a time of 52:07.

In short, a Fred shows up on the most basic of equipment and proceeds to hand you your a55 with raw dedication and talent. If you ever want to see a grown man cry, watch him get passed by Fred and finish 7 minutes faster than hey my Litespeed Vortex with the 54 tooth big ring and TT bars still make me look like a fvcking statue because I just =got dropped like a rock.


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## KevinC (Aug 2, 2004)

*Strange...*



53T said:


> YES, I expect an english teacher to know geometry (and trig) at the high school level. I expect math teachers to speak and write at 12th grade level. Am I alone in this expectation?



that not one soul replied to your post...give that some thought.


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## Spinfinity (Feb 3, 2004)

*I love reading "Fred" threads.*

Curiously, I've never heard the word used in conversation on shop rides. I've never been called one nor have I heard anybody refer to another rider as a Fred except for riders who are actually named Fred. The only places I remember seeing the term are bulletin boards and Bicycling Magazine, which, when you consider how people on this board view Bicycling Magazine, is kind of strange.

In any case, we all need somebody to look down on and choosing people who don't meet our cycling style standards is probably a pretty good choice. It's certainly better than hating immigrants, black people or homosexuals who are what they are and can't buy a new identity. Besidses Fred Threads often make great reading. We choose our bikes and our outfits and there is always hope for us fashion challenged and tasteless. So please, lots more of these posts. Should I someday decide that fitting in is what really matters, I want to know as much as possible about how to do it.


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## Trek_envy (Jun 15, 2004)

ttug said:


> I met Fred in 2002 at an unrated open 40k TT.
> 
> Fred showed up on a 1978 stock Peugeot, Chuck Taylor high tops, swimming trunks, bright white zinc sun block that made his hairy body appear to be an albino Yeti on acid.
> 
> ...


Damn, that was funny.

What an image----> "Getting passed like a statue"


And man, Bikerfox makes me laugh.


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## P-Quoddy (Oct 25, 2004)

pitboss12 said:


> I don't know the lingo. I've read of people referring to others in Fred jerseys on this site but am not really sure of what " Fred" means. Is a Fred just a poser or a RUB (for those into motorcycles)? Why is it specifically Fred and not Tom or Dick? Just curious.


The best way to find out is to read a copy of Bicycling Magazine while participating in a charity ride. It will become self-evident.


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## irregardless (Sep 4, 2002)

A Fred is someone who doesn't care what other riders think about what clothes he or she wears riding or how he or she rides.

Hail to the Freds.


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## filtersweep (Feb 4, 2004)

irregardless said:


> A Fred is someone who doesn't care what other riders think about what clothes he or she wears riding or how he or she rides.
> 
> Hail to the Freds.


Closet fred? I never miss an opportunity to race, have a great road bike, all the club gear, etc... but if you catch me commuting to work, you just might mistake me for a fred riding on an old fixed conversion with my backpack, frame pump, lights, etc...


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## Rthur2sheds (Jul 30, 2004)

*have fun and play nice...*

I don't give a rat's ass what anyone think of me... except wifey and the kids


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## Sintesi (Nov 13, 2001)

bimini said:


> ..You must read Styleman and follow his religion. Failure to follow his "advice" will immediately get you the scarlet letter of FRED and you will need to spend the reast of your life bearing this social burden...
> 
> .


Anyone who invokes the name of "Styleman" or indeed knows who he is is in fact a fred.

: )


----------



## Sintesi (Nov 13, 2001)

MR_GRUMPY said:


> Many "Freds" show up for a ride without the proper equipment. (No spare tube and no tire levers) A true "Fred" will borrow your tire levers and proceed to break one. When you tell him not to worry about it, he doesn't..



: ) : )


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## Sintesi (Nov 13, 2001)

owmynads said:


> I find this thread amusing. I think some people take the view that cycling is just some big fraternity. And fraternities have always amused me. A bunch of insecure guys run out to a house and are willing to subjugate themselves because, "My, my, my mommy says I should go to college and make some friends, so, can I hang out with you guys? Can I? Huh?" Sure, Skippy. Just put on this jockstrap and this sheep costume and we'll see you on the quad at noon.
> 
> Goddamn idiots. Be who you are. [email protected] all the rest. If you enjoy riding, enjoy it for yourself. I think most people get into this, as one poster has said, "too late in life to do much of anything [my paraphrase] in the racing world." While I doubt any of us in this super-focus-grouped, overmarketed world can defy labeling by people who know jack squat about us, I think it's important not to be as insecure as some frat rush, trying so hard to fit in that he becomes a misfit.
> 
> OwMyNads



OwMyNads is passionate about this topic apparently.


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## 1c0n0cla5t (Nov 24, 2004)

Spoiler said:



> This behavior is also seen in the Harley circles. It's sad because every year I read about 40 and 50-thing business men who got the urge to be a Hell's Angel for a day. They can afford a Harley, so they jump right in, thinking they're too smart to need a proper training course or helmet. They get themselves killed withing the first couple rides.



Ahh...classic. I call them "Highlands Ranch Hell's Angels" (after the well to do suburb they call home here in Denver). The girlfriend and I have had endless hours of fun watching these guys ride through downtown Denver on weekend nights, revving their engines and marvelling at how tough they look in their full "Harley Cheerleader" outfits. Stooges - the whole lot of them...


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## startle (Dec 2, 2004)

bimini said:


> Fred is a term used by 20 and 30 something year olds that have not grown up yet. It is often used by people that have some deep seated need to elevate themself above others so they can turn up their nose at people that don't look the same as themselves and don't wear all the latest cycling related fashion wear as themselves. Or, by people that need to rationalize all the money they have spend on that Carbon fiber rocket ship and the latest team kits even though they could not do a 1 hour 40 K Timetrial if they were given a 10 K headstart.
> 
> The following is considered Fred like to this crowd. I will start with my favorite:
> 
> ...


wow, that explains it. I seem a fairly popular guy at work, and have friends and stuff. but when I go on century rides to see all the fancy dudes, they all treat me like I got a bad disease, used to think it was the twenty five year old trek touring bike with the rear packs on and my lion head tied on,,,, but now it seems it could be soooo many things! I don't care I'll keep going cause a lot of those dudes are just sexy!!!!


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## 1c0n0cla5t (Nov 24, 2004)

cdmc said:


> For the truly brave here is a link to his website: http://www.bikerfox.com/glamourshots/index.htm


That is far and away the strangest bike-related site I have seen.


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## Fred_Litespeed (Aug 6, 2004)

The Walrus said:


> ...a cyclocrosser.
> 
> ...and a guy who wears ATB shoes on a Litespeed (or any other make) is _sensible_ if, like me, he's actually gonna get off the bike and walk around at some point.



Here here! It can also equals cost savings, i.e 1 pair of nice shoes that I can use on and off road. (Yes, eggbeater pedals on me road bike. They work great.)


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## Fred_Litespeed (Aug 6, 2004)

irregardless said:


> A Fred is someone who doesn't care what other riders think about what clothes he or she wears riding or how he or she rides.
> 
> Hail to the Freds.


And so by appropriating the language of our enemies we undermine their power to express derision or evoke shame. Rather we transform their language of insult into our own language of pride and identity; an identity not based on agression and exclusion, but one of brotherhood and acceptance. Those who must judge others in order to shore up their crumbling egos will have to invent a neverending dictionary of empty insults; or finally they must face themselves.

In the end, we are all Fred: some of us just don't realize it yet.


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## The Human G-Nome (Aug 26, 2002)

Fred_Litespeed said:


> And so by appropriating the language of our enemies we undermine their power to express derision or evoke shame. Rather we transform their language of insult into our own language of pride and identity; an identity not based on agression and exclusion, but one of brotherhood and acceptance. Those who must judge others in order to shore up their crumbling egos will have to invent a neverending dictionary of empty insults; or finally they must face themselves.
> 
> In the end, we are all Fred: some of us just don't realize it yet.


OMG, you are such a Fred!


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## ARP (Mar 7, 2002)

*Ever drive one of those Turbo'ed Neons?*



russw19 said:


> I don't know about that... my shop stocked Turd Polish! We had to break it out once in a while too.
> 
> The thing about polishing a turd is that you rub and rub and rub with the Turd Polish, and you can make that turd shine, but at the end of the day it still smells like a turd.
> 
> ...


180mph on the test track, stupid fast for a Neon.


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## ARP (Mar 7, 2002)

*Honestly....*



firstrax said:


> Fred!


How the hell, or better yet why the hell would someone let a pic of themselves like that get out on the internet? What is he jonezn' for?


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## FishrCutB8 (Aug 2, 2004)

Bump....just because I love this thread....


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## bimini (Jul 2, 2003)

*Dam you FishrCutB8 just*

Dam you. If I had a pie I would throw it at you!



FishrCutB8 said:


> Bump....just because I love this thread.....


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## mikewest (Jun 1, 2004)

*Better than that guy in pink?*


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## everydaybike (Feb 25, 2005)

Mike T. said:


> That ain't even close to being a fred. Could this be a fred -


NO, he's practicing belly breathing. 

Can't you see that?


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## amflyer (Mar 4, 2004)

*yeah, but...*

he's only a half bike behind someone.


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## longhorn (Apr 21, 2003)

Mike T. said:


> That ain't even close to being a fred. Could this be a fred -


Bono's pregnant! Is it a boy or a girl?


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## Bryan (Sep 19, 2004)

mikewest said:


>


You know he takes his cycling seriously because his legs are shaved!  And one other thing that troubles me. I never understood the necessity to match. Jeez it's like a woman with her properly matching purse and shoes! Blood red bike, green jersey, white helmet, black shorts and blue socks. Noone cares but my wife and a non-Fred! You buncha metrosexual elitist!!!


Somebody dug deep to wake the dead with this thread.


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## rbart4506 (Aug 4, 2004)

Hey!! You just described my wife and I...Well except for the saddle bags...


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## Thumper (Mar 18, 2005)

*My name is Leo and I'm a FRED!*

To wit:

My new Lightspeed Tuscany has a painted frame.
It is a 57, should have been a 55.
I'm going to put a 100 stem with a rise on it.
I use the same shoes/cleats on or off road.
I have Look pedals/shoes, but don't use them.
I use seats with cutouts.
I wear Performance jerseys and shorts, or whatever is on sale.
I go to spin class.
My band in the 90's was "Fred and the Heads" 
I ride solo in training rides and centurys.
I'm a geezer.
And the horror, I have other interests.

/s/ Fred in the Head


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